What Is Standing?

What does it mean to stand for your marriage? Some say it is a tremendous act of faith. Others say it is foolishness. Still others say it is witchcraft. I say it is one of the most significant things a person can do in a lifetime.

When God began to lead me in the stand for our marriage, I thought I was all about my husband getting out of sin and returning home. I figured whatever it took to make that happen was worth it. I had no idea what God had in mind.

First of all, standing for your marriage has to come out of obedience to the Lord. It can’t be based on how much you love your spouse. Love can turn to hate very quickly. Feelings are very fickle. It can’t be based on loneliness or need. Only the Lord can fulfill us and meet all our needs. No human being should be expected to do that for us. It can’t be based on guilt or sorrow either. Regretting what has happened in the past is no foundation for the future. If any of these things are motivating you, release them all to the Lord right now.

When Peter saw Jesus walking on the water, he wanted to join Him. Jesus gave him a word, “Come,” and Peter walked on the strength of that word. You are probably in a very grave storm right now and your marriage is in peril. There are many more storms to come and if you are going to walk on the water, if you are going to stand for your marriage, you must have a word from the Lord upon which to walk.

Someone else’s faith can’t do it for you. Someone else’s testimony can’t carry you through. Emotions and resolve won’t hold you up as the wind rises and the waves crash. You must know what the Lord has spoken to you and that is the word that will carry you. God has promised that His word will not return to Him void, without accomplishing that for which He sent it (Isaiah 55:11). You need the strength of His word to carry you.

When David returned to Ziklag and discovered that his family had been taken from him (1 Samuel 30), he asked the Lord, “Shall I pursue this troop? Shall I overtake them?” One might ask why David would ask God such a question when the answer seems pretty obvious. David asked God because he wanted the word of the Lord to go before him as he fought for his family. He wanted to know in the heat of battle that God had sent him in pursuit. God told him, “Pursue, for you shall surely overtake them and without fail recover all.”

Another reason you need to hear what God says is that many other voices around you will be saying many things. Many will tell you what you are doing is foolish. Many will tell you that it will do no good. Many will ask you, as they did me, if you are really that desperate. They will tell you to get on with your life. If you don’t know what God has said, then all voices will carry the same weight. To obey the Lord, you must know what He has told you. Then other voices will not be as strong.

So, where are you today? Maybe you are just beginning to face a marital crisis or maybe you have stood for some time now. Either way, do you know what God has said to you. Have you taken time to seek Him and ask Him for His word? Has God answered your question? Has He given you specific directions? Do you have His word upon which to walk? If not, you need to begin there today. Learning to hear His voice is the key to a strong stand. Learning to hear His voice is also so life-changing that you will never be the same again.

To this day I walk in a sweet relationship with the Lord that developed during the time of my stand. No one can shake that from my life. I hear His voice clearly and I easily sense His presence. Walking with Him is sweet. You can either look upon this time of your life as the biggest tragedy you have ever experienced or you can embrace this time as the sweetest school of the Spirit you will ever attend. The choice is yours and it begins with asking Him and then waiting for His answer to you. Love, Marilyn

“Oh come, let us worship and bow down; Let us kneel before the Lord our Maker. For He is our God, and we are the people of His pasture, and the sheep of His hand” Psalm 95:6,7. <

“My sheep hear My voice, and I know them, and they follow Me” John 10:27.

Author: Marilyn Phillipps

Married 49 years, we have three children and six grandchildren. My initial career of nursing prepared me to work with marriages that are wounded and in need of healing. For 35 my husband and I have led 2=1 International, a ministry to marriages and families around the world. We have seen miracle after miracle when many had given up hope. View all posts by Marilyn Phillipps